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Advise on boyfriends past?

OK so where do I begin.. My boyfriend and I have been together for 5 years. 2 years ago he confessed to me an experience that happened when he was 14 years old. He told me that from a young age he always felt confused about his sexuality. And that one day he had some neighbours over his house and that one of them was 6 years old asked him to rub his private area on his anus. My boyfriend accepted but during the act felt guilty and told the boy to go home. He never let the boy near him again. Ever since that incident he's had suicidal feelings and felt disgust and guilt to what he did to t

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Suggested Questions And Answer :

Advise on boyfriends past?

Anytime something is eating someone alive, professional help is called for.  He'll probably find it a relief even to just be able to tell the story to someone who is non-judgemental and is equipped to help him put it into an appropriate perspective.  Therapy is never a waste of time.
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Hi.  You don't want your past to ruin what you have now, and if you keep snooping and not trusting, you may lose the best thing that ever happened to you. Therapy could help you put this all behind you so that it doesn't interfere with with your current relationship.  You have to have trust in any relationship no matter what, and if you don't, it will lead to failure.  He's been with you for 10 months and is obviously happy with where he is, trust in yourself, your qualities and in him.  If another woman can get him away from you....then you never had him to begin with.  Enjoy your relationship and don't cloud it with doubts.  Insecurity will push your partner away quickly.  Have the attitude "if they can get him...they can have him."  This isn't conceit, it's merely saying if he loves you and is committed to you, he won't stray no matter what.  I think men like a woman who is secure in herself and life, and if you need to work on this, then do it.  I hope this helps, take care.
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bipolar boyfriend hostile and left for no reason

I am bipolar.  And you can ask my boyfriend.  I do this ALL THE TIME.   He is probly just "in a mood". That is what my boyfriend calls it when I do that.  Me and my boyfriend have been together a year and a half.  He deals with my bipolar very well.  He will most likely come back. But you need to think about. What if this is not the only time he does this? Will you stay? Because I can tell you this will happen again
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Take a deep breath and try to relax. 4 days is great but it's not all gonna happen over night. Be patient, give your body time to heal. I know it is really hard but exercise is the best thing for the anxiety, even if you have to force yourself( I did).... but I promise it paid off. This is just 1 day, all this will PASS, I promise. Stay Strong and fight this thing you can do it!!! Tommorow is  a new and better day!!!!!
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HI Welcome to the forum the trick to geting off this is taper slowly we cant discuss tapers in the open forum but a little less every few days and in a month you will be clean hope that helps check your e/mail keep posting for support we all want to see you succeed good luck and God bless Gnarly
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Hi welcome. Yup, that's classic addict behavior. And no, asking for someone unused opiates is not "normal." It's what we addicts do (I did that all the time w/ some silly lie as a reason why I "needed" them.) Usually when someone suspects this, they are right. Trust your instincts. Being broke is a huge symptom too. What I suggest to you is to let him know, calmly what you suspect. And yes, he will deny it. But, you only have one responsibility and that's to yourself so go to alanon, which is for the loved ones of addicts/alcoholics and start talking to others. You will get amazing support and understand this disease, too. People always think they need to make a decision NOW. You don't. Just get to a meeting. And the answers will start to become clearer for you:)
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I don't understand what's wrong with me...

I really should go back and reread what you've written, but I've got to be really honest here and say I just can't do it. My initial reaction after I read it was that you are making a MASSIVE mountain out of a molehill.............and I'm sticking with that. If you were NEVER sexually involved in ANY way with your texting "friend," then you have nothing to feel guilty about. That you now can't recall every single word that passed between you and your friend does not matter in the least. IT IS IN THE PAST AND THAT'S WHERE YOU NEED TO LEAVE IT! Why you are, apparently, suffering so much guilt now that you're having panic attacks is quite beyond me. If you have been honest with us, but most importantly, with yourself, then this crisis of conscience should not be happening. Only you have the answer to that. If you can't face whatever you may OR may not be keeping locked up, I would strongly suggest you get into some therapy so you can face it and move on with your life. I wish you the best. RubyWitch  
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Feel like I'm planting false memories in my own mind?

A therapist will try to help you figure why you do this, or figure how to change your thinking to stop it. One on one in person is needed, because we can't diagnose you from here.
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My boyfriend is addicted to pain killers

Tofens You shouldn't feel that you are the cause of his addiction HE IS. The thing with addicts is if they don't want or try to get clean they won't. What I mean by that is he has to want to get clean and has to put the effort in to do it. If you could get him to come online to this forum that would be a start. Have you discussed with your bf how this is impacting YOUR life and the relationship? That is where it all starts with open honest communication. I hope you can get him to join our group of caring addicts as we have ALL been there and done that and know how hardit is to get and stay clean. I will pray for you both God Bless---Rick
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