is this my fault?
You need to try suggesting counseling. Be very gentle with her. Even possibly suggest you both go so you'll know how to better handle the situation. Also, if she's really defensive about it, it can help to ease that if you are willing to try counseling also. She does need to get into counseling though. As a woman who was sexually abused growing up I understand the feelings of guilt your girlfriend is having. Most sexual abused victims at some point in time think the abuse was their fault or b/c of something they did. This is absolutely NOT TRUE!! I also struggled with "touching" certain areas bringing up past memories. If she is having "flasbacks", high anxiety, that type of thing it's possible she's suffering from PTSD. This also happens to alot of sexual abuse victims.
I can't say this enough, counseling really would be best for her. It's very difficult to overcome past sexual abuse. It has a huge affect on the victim and doesn't just go away on it's own. Many things can stem from sexual abuse...low self-esteem, extremely sexual, not sexual at all, depression, anxiety, etc. Just be patient with her and reiterate to her it is in no way her fault. Show your support by staying by her side and even in matters of sex. If you know a certain area you touch causes her to cringe...DON'T touch it.
I hoped this helped some... Read More At : ...